On time and motherhood

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I’ve been noticing the last few days that I have a hard time slowing down and breathing. So often I find myself rushing to get places; holding my breath; making frantic lists in my head; all with the hopes of either getting back to be with my girl as quickly as possible, or maximizing the time I’m away from her or when she’s sleeping to get as many things done as possible.

I don’t think this is healthy. I imagine it’s releasing all kinds of unhealthy hormones. I don’t want to have a shortened lifespan because I’m not breathing enough.

I’ve also been noticing how some moments are just quite wonderful. Today (appropriately, on mother’s day) there were so many moments when I looked at my daughter in wonder and absolute love, so enthralled with this amazing little person who’s part of my life and family. She astounds me!

Of course, there are also moments when I want to swear with frustration, or when I really would just like a little bitty break to do something else.

There were other deeper things I wanted to say. But, speaking of time … it’s close to 10, baby’s sleeping, and I have applesauce and a movie waiting for me. Oh yay!

Happy mother’s day all.

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